Belonging…

It’s like breathing 

Without holding onto every breath 

It’s like knowing I can take up space here 

I don’t have to shrink. 

& I let my guard down  

I become part of life 

The country I was born in  

Grew up & live in.  

There’s a colour mismatch though  

My mother’s motherland  

Not mine, hers 

I’m pinned onto that. 

& just like that something happens  

That one person who can’t bear those who look like me  

Aim all their ‘isms’ at me. 

& just like that 

My guard is up 

& I hold my breath 

They remind me I don’t belong  

There’s another place that’s mine 

Surrender back there 

& I’m left scared 

Till I remember to breathe again. 

If Country is what I need for belonging

I reject this notion

& say

I belong everywhere there’s Earth, sky and air

I choose the complexity of belonging here, there and everywhere.