Women and girls are killed each year by members of their own family, often their fathers, brothers, uncles, husbands and cousins – and sometimes mothers and other female relatives. So-called ‘honour killings’ are usually premeditated murders intended to restore a…

I was born into a typical middle-class Pakistani family which adhered to some basic traditional values but was otherwise relatively moderate in its religious practices. My father, a general medical practitioner who was born and raised in poverty, moved to…

I was 22 at the time. I was on a road trip in North Sulawesi when I met this guy. He was the most charming individual. His sparkling eyes clattering joy every time he talked. We were seated side by…

The other day I sent a message to my mum on WhatsApp: ‘Mum, were we in Iraq during the Iraq-Kuwait war?’ She answered right away: ‘yes’. I paused. I thought of how crazy it is that I can lose track…

‘You can’t understand Punjabi?!’ Rishma* said, mouth open in a grin stuck on pause that evolved into rolling laughter of disbelief. ‘No,’ I smiled, clenching my fists to prevent them from instinctively floating up and punching her in the jaw….

Sometime in late 2011, we sat in the office of a government official in Jordan, discussing plans to support small enterprises in a town in the south. I still remember my elevated heart-rate when I was told that the government…

I am 42 years old. I am a middle-class Pakistani woman of Pashtun, Punjabi and Sindhi origin, born and raised in the Persian Gulf. Since I was a little girl my gender presentation has confused people, especially men. With my…

Swara is the practice of giving your daughter or other female relative in marriage to an enemy in order to make peace and end feuds within and between families. It’s a historic part of Pashtun culture. Parveen‘s marriage took place…

My father probably doesn’t know what the word feminism means. He has possibly never heard of it. My father is a Pakistani man who grew up in the 70s. His school had no tables or chairs, so students would sit…

Dear Brother, The walls of our house on the estate were thin. Growing up there meant regularly waking up in the dark, hearing Anni (my sister-in law) muffling her cries through the floorboards above me. As the crying went on,…

Whenever I got beaten badly it was because I was having a ‘lesson’ in reading the Koran. Muslim children are expected to finish reading the Koran by the age of seven. I didn’t. Every time I mispronounced a word I…